Parting

How to survive parting with your beloved man?

How to survive parting with your beloved man?
Content
  1. Why is it difficult to let go and forget a young man?
  2. How to take?
  3. How easy is it to get over a breakup?
  4. How long will it take?
  5. What shouldn't you do?
  6. Psychologist's advice for women

Everything in life can someday end, including love. But this does not mean that our happy existence ends with the departure of love. On the contrary, one meeting will be followed by another. But why is it so sickening in the soul? Maybe because we don't know how to switch and “spin” the same record until suffering begins to affect our well-being?

Why is it difficult to let go and forget a young man?

Suffering is inherent in girls. Subtle natures fall in love and believe that they will definitely be happy. This happens because the female psyche is always tuned in to believe in a sweet chosen one.

Young ladies tend to "ascribe" non-existent qualities to their beloved ones. And in fact, everything does not turn out as we would like. The guy turns out to be not quite a decent person. It's not a secret for anyone that while a representative of the stronger sex is caring for a lady of the heart, he is trying to show himself only from his best side. Ascribes to himself various dignities, behaves like a knight. This is the psychology of men. To seduce your adored object, which guys don't go for. The whole world is ready to be thrown at your feet. But time passes, and some of them begin to look to the side, while others' feelings cool down.

There is nothing surprising. Many men cannot love the same woman throughout their lives. And if a parting happened due to the fault of a representative of the stronger sex, it means that you met the wrong person. Therefore, you should not dwell on this problem.

However, there will always be someone who will object that you cannot order your heart.To which we can safely answer that this is a controversial issue.

From the loss of a loved one or from his betrayal, some girls fall into deep depression, while others, on the contrary, quickly forget about the negative experience.

This happens because female characters have versatile features, and representatives of the weaker sex, like men, are divided into strong personalities and weak-willed natures. Girls who cannot control their emotions move in a circle of suffering. They justify the compulsive state of being strongly attached to another person.

This happens for various reasons.

  • Some people like to enjoy their pain. They like to pretend to be a victim. Even some people enjoy it. Of course, such pleasure is questionable and can lead to depression.
  • Others have character traits that are particularly obsessive. The psychological dependence of one person on another is characteristic of a neurotic personality. These tendencies must be fought in every possible way. First of all, it is necessary that the person himself wants to get rid of the obsession to achieve something.
  • Selfish habits also contribute to increased separation pain. In this situation, there are emotions that are aimed at the fact that the fairer sex feels offended and asks: "How could you leave me, so beautiful and loved by everyone?" From these thoughts, an inferiority complex and obsessions develop.
  • Failure to accept reality leads to suffering. The girl does not want to let go of the young man. She always thinks that her former lover will return to her, and she will be happy again, as before. Expectations increase stress, and this leads to a worsening of the problem.
  • After the breakup, some girls suffer from the fact that they are unable to suppress the decadent mood in themselves for a long time. The feeling of grief haunts them and only intensifies every day. It comes to the point that a person loses the ability to dream, strive for something, that is, plunges into an abyss of negative emotions. In this case, only the help of specialists can eradicate the problem.

When a difficult period comes, it is necessary to remember that help from the outside will sooner or later lead you to a positive result. However, know that the person himself should also strive to get out of depression as soon as possible.

No one can help you as well as you can help yourself.

How to take?

This is difficult to do, but you can, if you really want to. After all, you suffer not so much for the person himself as for the emotions that you experienced when you were with this person.

It is necessary to separate these two concepts. Then it will become easier for you to sort out your feelings. And for this, some tips will help.

  • First of all, you need to understand one thing: since the end of the relationship has come, it means that you made a mistake in your choice. Perhaps your boyfriend turned out to be different from what you imagined him to be.
  • Next, you need to figure it out and ask yourself if there were real feelings between you, maybe you invented them yourself and believed in them yourself. Try to analyze the events that happened to you while your boyfriend was around. Perhaps you will find many inconsistencies in his actions.
  • Finally, don't hope that things will still form and your boyfriend will come back to you and ask for forgiveness. This will never happen. And the sooner you understand this, the faster your heart will open to new feelings.
  • Look around and you will see that you are not alone. Perhaps tomorrow you will meet a worthy person whom you will love.
  • No need to wake up and think that this day will pass again without your loved one.Train yourself to open your eyes in the morning and think not about the lost relationship, but about those events that will have to happen during the day. Surely you will have interesting meetings with peers, studies and hobbies, to which you should devote all your free time.
  • Switch your consciousness to another wave. Learn to think differently, and then you will succeed.

To accept means to understand and realize the problem. As soon as you do this, then the rehabilitation process will begin.

How easy is it to get over a breakup?

The girl does not have to dwell on a negative event. You need to understand that there are no accidents in life. Everything that happens in our destiny should have happened someday. But as they say, whatever is done, everything is for the best. And it is difficult to disagree with this statement.

Circumstances often, as it seems to us at first glance, are not in our favor. We begin to suffer greatly from losses and grievances. Over time, awareness of everything that happens. There is no longer any regret left in the soul, since it becomes clear that this is how fate relieves us from unnecessary torment. For example, a woman was dating a beloved man. She expected that someday the chosen one would propose to her. But time passed, and the representative of the stronger sex continued to use his partner for his own purposes. Why take on the obligations that are inherent in a married person when you can live without them? This is what sociopaths usually do.

The man in this situation was satisfied with everything, but the woman suffered from not being sure of the future. And then he came. The young man met a new love, and put his ex-girlfriend out the door as an unnecessary thing. Any woman will be shocked by such a turn of events. And this is quite normal. Long suffering and suffering in this case is not worth it. It is necessary to realize that fate has given you a chance to get rid of more serious consequences. In the future, a new meeting with a worthy person awaits you. You will definitely be happy.

Step through the past decisively and move on along the path of life.

It must be remembered that nothing good in such a relationship was waiting for you and will not wait any longer. Therefore, consider that you are somewhat lucky, thank your guardian angel. Another situation is when a girl and a guy broke up suddenly. After a long relationship, he left his girlfriend. The pain of loss tears my soul apart. However, here you need to think about it and ask yourself if there was love in your relationship. Perhaps it was not there, and everything that seemed so fundamental and happy, you invented for yourself.

Tears of sorrow will not help. This means that it is necessary to take measures to restore your balanced state. First, try to remember the good moments that happened in your life while you were with your loved one. Then remember the negative aspects. Mentally "weigh" all the pros and cons. It is possible that you will be very surprised that you practically do not remember anything good. And so it turns out that just a month ago you had a reliable rear, which turned out to be not as reliable as it seemed.

Know that a decent guy always thinks about the consequences before starting a relationship.

A real man takes on obligations and, in spite of everything, fulfills them. Of course, anything can happen in life, but a decent young man will not "waste his time on trifles." If he swore to love you, then he will fulfill his promise. If you come across another type of man (unfaithful, selfish, emotionally cold), then you should not regret that your relationship with him collapsed. It was predictable, you just could not assess their viability due to some circumstances. Chances are, your mind has been overshadowed by a strong infatuation, passion, or love.

The important thing is that you are free again now.

At the moment, it is not advisable to start a new relationship. Otherwise, you will randomly start looking for a new partner, and such actions are fraught with mistakes and new frustrations. First you need to deal with your old feelings. Let go of the situation and just live. You will gradually enter a new direction of life. Fate itself will present you with new feelings. A more difficult situation is for those women who meet with married representatives of the stronger sex.

It is not surprising that for some husbands having children and a wife is not an obstacle to a parallel relationship with a girl.

This is how male psychology works. But girls need to remember that a relationship with a married man does not carry anything good and can end suddenly and very badly:

  • his wife may find out about the husband's vicious hobby, and then you may be attacked by her;
  • the legal spouse will stop all meetings, since she has all the rights to do so;
  • you are wasting your precious time with the person who is using you.

If your relationship with a married representative of the stronger sex has ended, then in this case you should rather be happy than upset. You should not remember the words and promises that your partner said to you during meetings. Remember that he did this in order to prolong your relationship and lull your vigilance. Only a small percentage of married men keep their promises. And if the promise to divorce his wife is fulfilled, then this step is taken under great pressure from his mistress.

You should not waste your nerves on a not quite "full-fledged" gentleman, because one half of him has always belonged to his wife and children, and the other (less reliable) - to you.

Stop suffering and face the obvious facts. When you become aware of them, you will realize that you are lucky, and you did not have time to waste most of your life. Tune in to an optimistic mood and you will be open to new meetings again.

How long will it take?

What period is needed to recover from the past, no one will say for sure. Some of the fair sex forget about the negative experience right away and never later remember, but someone goes through their whole life. But these are extremes. Most often it is very painful. Try to find the strength in yourself, start making your life happy on your own.

What shouldn't you do?

Every decent person will keep himself in control, despite the severe pain. Try to cultivate self-restraint. Control your emotions and feelings. However, this does not mean that you need to grit your teeth, walk with a stone face and hold back tears with all your might. When a breakup occurs, the person's state of mind is on the verge of a nervous breakdown. This is an unpleasant but normal result.

At this moment, you need to throw out your feelings: cry, sob loudly and feel sorry for yourself. In no case should this state become a long-term process. To prevent this from happening, start working on getting yourself out of negative emotions as soon as possible.

There are a few things you should avoid doing to make you feel better and soften the breakup.

  • Make a scandal and expose your tantrums for everyone to see. This will not achieve anything, but spoil the opinion of the people around you.
  • Do not feel sorry for yourself and let the people around you do it. Pity is a bad feeling. The more you torment yourself with suffering, the more your depression will grow. In addition, not all of your relatives and friends are able to sincerely sympathize with you. There will also be those who will make a mockery of your grief for the "well-wishers" around you.
  • Closing in on yourself is also a bad idea. On the contrary, communicate more, participate in public events.
  • Do not take revenge or get angry. By doing this, you will only exacerbate the problem.

Psychologist's advice for women

A specialist will certainly give you a helping hand and pull you out of negative emotions, as if from a dark well. But for this you need to have the means and time. If for some reason you cannot afford to attract outside help, use the advice of a psychologist.

  • Stop thinking about the person who hurt you. Memories will not help bring him back, but you will gain a depressive state.
  • To quickly destroy the feelings that you have for your former lover, try not to stir up the past. If you catch yourself thinking that you are again thinking about your partner and what was connected with him, then immediately pull yourself back and switch your consciousness to something else. For example, think about an upcoming joyful event or work. Do this constantly and gradually, such actions will become a habit.
  • Write down all your experiences on paper. Write carefully each letter, putting your pain in each word. Let the paper become for you a kind of "vest" in which you can cry. Then roll it into a ball and set it on fire. Look at the fire and smoke, imagine how all your problems disappear.
  • Play sports. This hobby will help one hundred percent in getting rid of the obsessive state.
  • Start looking after your appearance. Change your image beyond recognition. These actions will take a lot of time and effort. You simply won't have the resources to suffer.
  • Find new friends and like-minded people for yourself. Do what you love with them.

Go through life in a positive way and do not communicate with those people who may upset you in some way.

Try not to deal with negativity, but skillfully move away from it. And then you will become invulnerable.

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