What if my husband is cheating and how to deal with it?

Devotion has long been valued in human society. Fidelity between spouses is the main bond and lasting element. Without this, there will be no full-fledged family. Husband and wife should treat each other with love and respect. Then their marriage will be stronger. But what if one of the spouses does not want to accept the honest conditions that are inherent in the marriage bond?

There can be many reasons for betrayal, but each betrayal for a family in most cases ends with one thing - a tragedy. Immediately it is necessary to make a reservation that not all families perceive cheating in the same way. Some spouses then live, having somehow survived her and not undertaking anything drastic, while others get divorced after the betrayal of one of them.

This is because not every person is ready to forgive another person's mistakes. Only one who has a special character will be able to come to terms with the infidelity of a partner or become unfaithful himself. But is it worth blaming anyone for this?

Most people take family ties very seriously. But even among this majority there are those who cannot do without the attention of the opposite sex. Inconsistency of thoughts and desires leads to easy flirting. And this happens due to the fact that in a family where one of the spouses allows himself to cheat on his soul mate, there are many problems in the relationship.

Here are some of them.

• The husband is an egoist with high self-esteem. He may look to the side due to the fact that, in principle, he is not able to take care of his spouse, since he thinks only of himself.
• Some husbands believe that family is their duty and work.They carry out their direct duties there, sincerely believing that they can sometimes allow themselves to "take a break" from the family in the circle of other women. Therefore, going to the side is perceived by them as a kind of vacation in a sanatorium.
• There are also men who commit adultery because of a sincere conviction that they can sometimes allow themselves to be pampered, slightly "hooligan". Such husbands perceive their betrayal towards their wife as a kind of habit in the form of smoking or alcohol. And they reason something like this: addictions "kill" not only family happiness, but also health, and there is nothing terrible in having fun with a mistress either for health or for family well-being.
• The Lovelaces are another male group that cheats on their spouses. They cannot resist the female charm because of the specific structure of their psyche.
• The mismatch of sexual opportunities and versatile views on sex with a spouse also lead to frequent adultery on the part of a man. This happens, for example, in cases when the wife is a kind of "gray bird", carried away by her everyday life. Such a woman is not interested in anything other than cooking and taking care of children. And the husband wants to see next to him a gorgeous woman in a beautiful dress, whom he is not ashamed to show to friends and acquaintances. When desires do not coincide with reality, the spouse finds his ideal on the side.
• One-time betrayals can occur against the background of alcoholic intoxication. This fact can be considered a force majeure circumstance. Although it should be noted that not a single decent man will allow himself to be betrayed, even if he drank a lot.

Psychologists say that the causes of many troubles must be sought in oneself. The unwilling wife is related to her husband's infidelity. It must be remembered that you yourself plan your happiness and life.

You can react to cheating in different ways. It is not forbidden to pretend that you do not notice the fact that your husband is cheating on you. Some women forgive infidelity, referring to the fact that the psychology of men is like that and nothing can be done about it.

There are such persons who are trying to justify such actions of their chosen one. For example, if a man cheated after a quarrel in the family, the woman tries to smooth out the situation, while also feeling guilty. This is her choice, the advice here may not work.

Of course, each of us is free to do as he sees fit, and no one has the right to condemn for this. But what about when a man is constantly lying to his wife, saying in excuse that he is being detained at work, and at this time he is cheating with another woman?

In this case, everything depends on the decision of his wife. If she allows her faithful to behave this way, then this matter does not bother her much.

It is a different matter when a husband cheated with another woman, and the wife found out about it purely by chance. She got emotional stupor from this turn of events. It is good if the offended wife has good self-control and does not allow herself to do anything stupid.

In any case, the betrayal of a loved one for a long time can unsettle even the most restrained representative of the fairer sex. At such a moment, she needs support from close people and even the help of specialists. You may also need drug therapy.

The betrayal of her husband cannot be justified by anything: neither a dose of alcohol drunk, nor family quarrels, nor his depression, nor the fact that he earns a lot of money. Having learned about her husband's infidelity, it is necessary to take action. Of course, the very first decision is divorce. Perhaps a woman is not ready to take this path, because she loves her husband very much or depends on him. Therefore, in this case, it is necessary to act on the basis of specific life circumstances.

For example, if the husband does not leave the family after his exposure. This situation can mean a lot. It is possible that he simply has nowhere to go. Another option: the unfaithful man does not love his wife and has never loved, but he is comfortable living with her in marriage. It is difficult to leave the house, where it is always warm and cozy.

In this situation, a woman needs to think about the fact that her husband is simply using her for his own purposes. If you forgive him, then the betrayal will resume with renewed vigor. A man will understand that he can get away with everything, so he will feel his impunity.

There are two options for solving this problem. One is to get a divorce, the other is if you are not ready to part with your loved one forever, try to re-educate him (within reasonable limits, of course).

For example, you can start flirting with other members of the stronger sex, change outwardly and become a well-groomed person, stop paying attention to your spouse, start behaving selfishly, and so on. If your partner is a sane person, his mind will turn on and he will try to correct his mistakes.

Remember that you must keep all your techniques under control and not go too far. Only you know the character of your chosen one, so proceed from this position.

Another thing is when the husband cheated once and now greatly regrets it. He has become unlike himself, everything is trying to justify himself and asks for forgiveness. But in this case, everything depends on your and only your decision. If you want to forgive - forgive. If you feel that you will not be able to come to terms with the betrayal, it is better to think again before making a decision.

You cannot act in half in such situations. If you do not forget this story forever, then your husband's infidelity will poison you every day of your life. As a result, depression awaits you. You yourself will be tortured, and you will exhaust your loved ones. Therefore, be honest with yourself and make the decision that your soul will tell you. Just not right away, give yourself time to cool down.

If you are tired of the constant betrayal of your husband, and you are on the verge of a nervous breakdown, then you definitely need to do something about this. Your spouse used to cheat, but it doesn't seem to bother you that much. So what has happened now that the betrayal of your spouse does not allow you to live in peace?

Most likely, pain and resentment overflowed the "well of patience." This time you decided to end this state of affairs once and for all, but you don’t know how to do it. To this we can say the following: a divorce, of course, will save you from suffering over time, but there is no guarantee that some sorrows will not be replaced by others.

Since you allowed your spouse to cheat before, then there were reasons for this. This means that he is dear to you and you are ready to endure endless betrayal. Divorce in such a case will not help solve problems, but will only increase them. Therefore, you need to act differently.

1. Work on your appearance. Change your image and make yourself irresistible. Your numerous rivals will fall into a stupor, and some of them may retire after such a turn of events.
2. Start to linger at work. Imagine everything as if someone is caring for you. Buy a bouquet and bring it home. At home, with a confused smile, approach the flowers and correct them. Answer your spouse's questions with restraint. Let him think that you have an admirer.
3. If your spouse starts making claims about appearance, delays at work and flowers, then remind him of his endless betrayal and tell him that you take an example from him. The only caveat: actions with flowers can be performed when you are confident in the restrained nature of your partner. If he is jealous and unpredictable, then it is better to refuse such provocations.
4. Find yourself a hobby or sign up for a master class. You will have a great time there and learn to treat yourself with respect. In addition, such activities can provoke feelings of jealousy in your husband. Men are jealous of women for every little thing. And your new hobby will hurt his pride. And who knows, maybe your husband will start treating you with love.
5. Play sports. It will distract you from the problem, improve your health and shape, and make your spouse wonder if he might lose you. If this does not help much, then start from point 1 of this list.

If it was once - I mean betrayal - then there are more questions than answers. On the one hand, you are tormented by feelings of jealousy and resentment, on the other hand, you do not want to leave, although your husband's oversight has become a serious test for you.

On top of that, the spouse is also very repentant, asks for forgiveness, and you feel that he is sincere in his feelings. In this situation, you can be advised to do the following.

1. To understand yourself, try to be alone with yourself, calm down and start mental reasoning.
2. The pros and cons should be weighed.
3. Consider what happens if you divorce? Think about material and moral conditions here. Will they be safe with you in the event of a divorce?
4. Play the situation and imagine how events will develop if you are left alone, without the support of your husband.

When there is a betrayal of her husband, the woman is tormented by the question: what to do? On the one hand, pride and resentment do not allow forgiving a man, on the other hand, letting go or expelling the unfaithful spouse from the house means leaving him forever, losing his family and peace. If you hesitate and are inclined to believe that your husband should stay with you, then forgive and forget about the accidental mistake. After all, we are not all angels.

A woman is faced with a choice when she loves her spouse very much and does not want to lose her well-being. But how to keep or return a loved one if he himself is confused and does not know with whom to stay: with his family or with his mistress.

You always have to fight for love. Will you give your loved one on a "silver platter" with your own hands? Regardless of the answer to this question, you need to make a definite decision. If you decide to stay in your own interests, then try the following.

1. Do not reproach your husband for his betrayal, talk to him about how offensive and painful it is for you to realize that he has betrayed you.
2. Remind your husband of the vows he made when you applied to the registry office.
3. Remember that there are children in your family. They need a father and love both parents. It will be very painful for the guys to learn that their father decided to leave home for another woman.
4. The desire to punish the offender should not be obsessive. Quarrels and scandals will not achieve anything. In no case should you take revenge and harm the lover. Pretend it doesn't exist at all.
5. If the husband hesitates in choosing, then help him make this choice in your favor. Be gentle and friendly with him. At the same time, do not cross the line and do not be overly intrusive.
6. All the time, talk about how you have an exemplary family. This will make the husband think about the fact that he will lose stability if he divorces. Nobody knows how his fate will turn out with another partner, but with family people he always felt good.
7. Do not rush your husband and do not rush with a choice. Do not blackmail children. Be patient and wait for his prudence to awaken.

During pregnancy, a woman becomes irritable.Not every man can withstand her whims. If you have a husband with iron nerves and a "golden" character, then you should not worry. He will endure all the trouble. However, even such supermen need relaxation.

Some are looking for her on the side. Some commit adultery deliberately, others not quite consciously. By no means can it be said that all husbands are unfaithful. Of the large number of representatives of the stronger sex, only a small percentage will be typed.

Treason is always betrayal. It is impossible for such actions to be part of the norm. They should not be justified by the fact that the wife is in a position, and therefore her character and appearance have changed a lot. It must be remembered that right now it will be especially offensive for her to learn about treachery.

An unfaithful husband in such a situation betrays twice: a wife and a child. How can you hope for it in the future? Therefore, if the wife decides to leave him, no one will condemn her. Another question is that it is difficult to do this for a number of reasons. For example, it will be difficult for a pregnant spouse to cope alone with the problems that arise after the birth of the baby.

In such a situation, comprehensive support is needed. If she has relatives, they will provide support. And if a woman does not have close people, then she will have to come to terms with the situation. You need to think soberly, so you should not rush to decide on a divorce. It is worthwhile to think carefully about your actions and the seriousness of the problem. You must first give birth, and only then act according to the situation.

At the moment, you should take care and think about your health and the health of the unborn child, and only then solve global issues. You do not need unnecessary nervous shocks in the next two years. Therefore, postpone the decision until later. And then, you see, everything will be formed.

After the betrayal of your husband, you lost your trust in him, which is very difficult to return back. Love remains, but at the same time, you dislike your spouse, presenting him alone with another. And this is quite normal and correct. It is one thing on his part to sincerely repent, and another thing is not to make any more mistakes.

You are tormented by questions about your husband's loyalty or unfaithfulness at the present time. No one will answer these questions to you, no matter how hard you try, and if you torture yourself with them, you can lose your peace forever. The depressive state must be eradicated. And the advice of a psychologist will help you with this.

• Stop spinning the same record in a circle - every time imagine how upset you are that you were betrayed. From this you will suffer even more.
• Stop quarrels with your husband because you cannot forgive him, even though you pretend to forgive him. Irritation can become a habit, and you thereby poison the life of yourself, your spouse, and even your children.
• Do not blame yourself for cheating on your husband. Why did you decide that you could have foreseen such a development of events? What should have happened happened, but you could not influence the outcome of the case in any way.
• Understand that your life is not over. Men like you and your husband needs you. Otherwise, he would have left you and did not even begin to apologize.
• Do not involve children in this conflict. You and your husband will make up, and the younger generation can harbor resentment and receive psychological trauma.
• Switch to a new wave. Offer your husband something fun to do and do it with him.
• Walk more together, go to visit. It will bring you closer to your spouse and boost your self-esteem. In spite of everything, you are together and love each other.

You are a woman, therefore, you are obliged to save the family from disintegration in time. It is not for nothing that the fairer sex consider themselves to be the keepers of the hearth. You need to maintain warmth in the house, create coziness, so that your man strives to return to the family, and not go to another woman for an attentive attitude to himself. Therefore, follow the guidelines below.

• Don't stress yourself and your entire family.Problems come and go, but happiness remains. As long as you are together, you are happy.
• If you've made mistakes in the past that led to family breakdowns, try to avoid them in the future. My husband doesn't like it when you spend a long time outside the family with your girlfriends. Because of this, you've already had fights. Don't do what your husband doesn't like if you want to keep the relationship going. Choose what is more dear to you: marriage or empty conversations with unmarried gossips? The answer is obvious.
• Don't let random people into your life. They can hurt you and do something unpleasant. Try to communicate with your loved ones.
• Have you recently got married? Always be yourself and stop playing in public. Show what you are really capable of. Your life together with your husband has already begun, and theatrical scenes should not be confused with reality.
• Accept your husband as he is. You yourself chose your life partner. All people have their faults, and your husband may not be perfect either. Therefore, come to terms with his habits. Don't make scandals over trifles.

• Always be in a good mood. Positive attracts positive. They don't leave good people. Therefore, override your bad mood and try not to scream or grumble around.
• Praise your spouse more often for doing something around the house: taking out the trash, fixing the tap, pasting the wallpaper. This will give him strength for new achievements.
• Go on a visit and show others that you have a pretty strong family.
• Start saving for a new car. A common cause will strengthen the relationship.
• Walk with children in nature more often. It unites.
• Solve any problems that arise with your spouse. Only at the same time do not be annoyed with each other and do not devote your acquaintances to them. If someone finds out about your troubles, it will not become easier for you, but gossip will certainly create fertile ground for conflicts in your family.
• Do household chores together more often. Building a country house becomes an interesting activity when you are next to each other. A joint pastime promotes unification, and a common cause strengthens family relationships.

Remember that everything in this world depends on our positive attitude. As we build our life, so it will flow.

You will learn more about what to do if your husband is cheating on you in the following video.